GD, I need help!

Yeah, I know it'b been a while isnce I've posted last. And to be honest, there is only one reason for this post:

I NEED HELP!

As some of you might know, I am not relly into computers or anything what has to do with it. I am happy knowing how to post a message. Any changes frighten me. And now THIS had to happen.

I wanted to sign in to my blogger accounts, with this great promise popping up that everything will be better, as soon as I will have changed to a google-account. So I am willing, and give it a try. The result??? I can not post on the "babes" blog anymore. (Nor do I know now how to do a link).

So I am now asking my great and wise friend GD to help me. What do I have to do to to be able to post again. I have such a nice suprise which I would just love to tell you all about...

Thanks in advance!!!

Some things just don't change

Days, weeks, moths have passed... and no posts from me. Generally busy, mostly nothing to say.

Now, back on another vacation in my favorite "hang out", too many familiar things are happening...

As a frequent reader of this blog (ha, ha), you might remember my goodbyes to a certain person?!? And back then I really ment them!

And now???

I saw him again, unplanned, and all old feelings are back. I HATE THIS!!!

How this could happen, you ask? I'll give you a short introduction:

During my visit here in good old Minnesota my sister had to go into the hospital. After her surgery noone felt it would be a good idea for her to return to a house full of children, foreign exchange student and family visitors. As our beloved mom was here for a visit in her own house, it was decided my sister should go there for recovery. Who took her? I did. Not knowning what, better who would be crossing my path once again. So we just arrived and it was proclaimed that we (my son and me) would stay for dinner. No problem. Until... I heard that there was another dinner guest to be expected. Of course, at that point I could hardly say I am leaving. So I had to stay. See HIM again... why, why, why???
So we had dinner. I was very cool and reserved. I did a wonderful job of not letting anyone know what my inside felt like (a caterpillar and butterflies having a party). When dinner was over it was, thankfully, time for me to head back. (I really needed to get out of the house!)
On my drive home I could not keep my mind off of him. And basically not since then.

It sucks! And I hate myself for this! Why, after 17 years, is he still able to make me feel like a goddamn' teen? Since that day he appears in my dreams, day and night. I can not stop thinking. Analyzing my dreams... but not getting anywhere.

I should call him. So we could talk. But I am even too nervous to do that (plus the fact that noone is answering the phone. Except the answering machine. To which I do not want to talk).

Anybody know a good psychiatrist?

July post

Just so that the month doesn´t pass without a post...

1. FIRST NAME? Helden, Kleine is really the last name ;)
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Actually my mom says it was after a dutch princess. If only she would have known how I would turn out.
3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Watching a TV commercial. Geez, since beeing a mom I am too close to tears.
4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? No, therefore I try to write in bold letters only.
5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? roasted honey turkey breast.
6. KIDS? Yes.
7. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH ME? How would I know. If I were another person would I have evered moved to the states? Would we have ever met???
8. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? Right here. You´re reading it.
9. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Oh NO, I would never ever dare to...
10. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Nope. Ugly surgery, let me tell you!
11. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? NO. Too afraid of hights. And I don´t believe it would cure me.
12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Special K red fruits
13. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM Off? No. Most of the time I wear shoes that, fortuneately, do not need to be untied. Only unzipped...
14. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Physically? No. But strong enough to carry the boy up to the 4th floor without an elevator.
15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Anything containing caramel and NO raisins!
16. SHOE SIZE? 39 (I have no idea what that converts to)
17. RED OR PINK? None really. If I had to pick - pink.
18. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? My (sometimes) short temper. And that I am a jealous person and judgmental. Hey, almost like PJ!
19. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My babes!
20. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? N/A
21. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? beige shorts, no shoes. It is late at night and still hot outside.
22. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Ahoi brause teddys (sherbert teddys). We have NO chocolate in the house. Damn it!!
23. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? My neighbors on their balconies, drinking and laughing.
24. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Something green.
25. FAVORITE SMELL? The ocean.
26. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Mr. KH. He is still at work and wanted to say "good night".
27. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO? The eyes.
28. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? It wasn´t really sent to me... But I love the person I copied it from!!
29. FAVORITE DRINK? Call me lame, but bottled water. And coffee!!
30. FAVORITE SPORT? Snowboarding. I should really move somewhere closer to mountains!
31. EYE COLOR? Blue
32. HAT SIZE? Who cares?!?
33. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No, only glasses.
34. FAVORITE FOOD? Chocolate.
35. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDING? Happy ending.
36. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED AT THE MOVIES? I don´t remember the title. It was on my last visit to the US. Starring Reese Witherspoon nad some guy. She was in a coma and he moved into her apartment...
37. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? white.
38. SUMMER OR WINTER? Hard to say. Both if the summer is nice and warm and the winter with lots of snow.
39. HUGS OR KISSES? They come together.
40. FAVORITE DESSERT? Creme Brulee. And a really good Panna cotta!
41. WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? If I would send this to someone? I would never dare to! Therfore no answer possible.
42. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? see above.
43. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? None at the moment. Harry Potter was the last.
44. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? No mouse pad.
45. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Can´t remember. First the news and then... Must have been something very trivial ;)
46. FAVORITE SOUNDS? Waves.
47. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles.
48. FURTHEST PLACE YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? East: Hong Kong, West: California
49. WHAT'S YOUR SPECIAL TALENT? I am not sure I have one. At least noe which comes to my mind...
50. WHEN AND WHERE WERE YOU BORN? December 9th, 1972 in Greifswald, Germany.
51. WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
If you´ve read. the above, you know the answer.

* I needed a change of color. The yellow looked like somebody vomited all over my blog. Hope this goes better...

For all soccer-fans

No. In real life I hate soccer. I would never, ever go to the stadium to watch a game.

But now it is different. The worldcup is actually taking place in Germany. And somehow the fever has taken control over me, too. I am still not going to the stadium (I need to save my money for a new pair of jeans, remember), but I do watch the games on the telly.

And who would have ever thought that the German team would get as far as the semi-finals?!? Everybody said they wouldn´t even pass the qualificaion-round*. Yeah right, look at them now!! We have a German saying that fits just perfectly: " Tot gesagte leben laenger." Which basically means that the so-called dead live longer.

I am excited! I think I will now join my fellow Germans in celebrating.
CHEERS!

*Hey, sorry that the US team had to go home.

Shopping blues

A recent post on my babes site enspired me to this post.
There it is stated that shopping for make-up is a hatred thing, almost as bad as having to find a new bra, pair of jeans or swimsuit. And don´t I KNOW what that means!

Unbelievably, but true, I have been searching for the perfect jeans since april! (That was the month when my favorite pair of jeans started to disolve). And having put myself to a spending limit of $250, you would think this is an easy task. But no!! Either the jeans had the extrordinary price of $400 (and up), had a not-so-perfect-fit (even though the label states differently) or they just looked like sh.... I tried all sorts of trendy brands, i.e. seven, true religion, rock&republic, acne etc. and so on. Out of frustration I bought a pair which I now hardly wear. It will most likely rot in my closet until it will be handed to the red cross or the salvation army.

Of course, I could just go and buy the same brand as I had before. But I thought I needed a change. I WANTED a change. Something new and fresh.*

So now, almost three month later I still don´t have a new hot pair of jeans. Nor do I have a clue of where to find it. I guess that is the price one has to pay for too much vanity...

*Especially now, since things are not working out so well with the new job. Which I didn´t know at the time I started the search. Which should not be relevant in such decisions anyway.

Changes and chances

As some might have heard, or read, I am out, working on some changes in my life. Not private ones, but career wise. They don´t have to take place immediately. Though sometime this year wouldn´t be bad.*
It isn´t the fact that I do not enjoy my current job. Not at all. I love working there! I just have a feeling it isn´t getting me anywhere. And the working hours could be better... Plus the below mentioned fact. So therefore, I am keeping my eyes open for new opportunities. (If anyone has a job offer let me know!).
One interview has allready taken place. Continental airlines. Great company. Cheap airfares for employees ;) Plus a few other very positive facts. Why my excitement isn´t roaring up high??? Three weeks of training. In NYC. Which would be cool and completley fantastic. If I could take the boy along. But knowing I would be away from him for three weeks gives me a slight heartache.
I should hear their decision in the next couple of weeks. And until then I will not clog up my mind with the above...
I also have another interview mid-may. For an insurance company. Don´t have any facts about my position yet. But of what I heard so far it doesn´t sound too bad. It could be in the staff department, controlling, distibution or marketing. And the working hours would be VERY good! With very good I mean family and daycare friendly.


* The reason for this might be that we are planing of having at least one more sibling for the boy and my current social insurance payment wouldn´t even cover our rent.

Summertime

FYI: I hate "summertime".

No. Not the the time of the year when it is summer, dah. But the time when we have to turn our clock one hour ahead.

Waking up on a sunday morning, thinking of a quiet and peaceful breakfast with the family is a great thought. Noticing 2 minutes later that this is not to happen because hubby has ro rush to work is awful. Noticing 2 hours later that it way past noon and the day is almost over and NOTHING has been acomplished, sucks! Knowing that KH jun will NOT be in bed at his usual bedtime is dreadful. And considering the though of having to get up an hour earlier tomorrow morning... makes me want to go hide under my beadspread!